Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Letter to A Friend, If We Still Are Friends

Sis is back from uk with her friend which she hate so much just because he likes her. Hmm, sis is so weird maybe its because she got low hormones which result in her being fatty bom bom. =p The sad thing is i'm having exams now and tomorrow will be my last paper, which i stress a lot about : law! After my exams i would have to think of what to study for degree. Time passes so quick. Many things happen lately..

I read my friend blog today and i think we'r no longer friends because she has decided to not be with us anymore. She wrote about her financial, friendship, and health problem. I have known her since primary school and the sad thing about it is, i don't think she ever treated me as her friend before. The betrayel which i still remember until now and the promise i make, that one day i will betray her back as how she did to me. But i never did. I have the thought but never the intention or act to do so,mainly because she is stil my friend. I have treated her as my friend for many many years now, and i hope we'r stil friends.

She's quite unlucky in relationship problem and financial and health wise. My advice would be to not hurry in relationship because if your meant to be with him, your meant to be. No one can tear you apart. Financial wise, you said its settle so no worries in that. But club less frequent would help you save money because clubbing is a waste of money. We'r paying them way too much just to have fun in that few hours. We can create the atmosphere when you have a bunch of friends with you, booze around and loud music. Isn't that enough? About your health, i think its fine because you seem fine. But of course, its because you seem fine. Maybe the truth is your hurt from it and as a friend i'm here. But should i still be here for you?

We might have done some wrong doings here and there, but you gotta admit that you did too which you might not know because sometimes other people see you clearly more than yourself. A friendship for many many years might survive this if there is an open heart is all of us.

That was one of it, and another thing is something that i can never runaway from, relationship. I have come to a point which i don't intend to care anymore about him. Yet i still care because if i wasn't i wouldn't be in this relationship anymore. I still care deeply and i still do love him. But some things are push to the edges and i'm about to fall. I want to fall so i can getaway from this misery, but i'm not willing to lose all the memories, holding hands, kisses and love we share. If i end things with him, i'll be going alone to nirvana, borders, and cinemas. And what about his family? I spend time knowing them and it will all be put to waste when thing end between us. Some say that relationship is between the both of us, but other things are taken into account also when your with this person for 2 years.

I don't want to avoid, but i'm just not ready to face it. When i'm ready to face it, it is the moment when i'm ready to start a new chapter in life. I want to be single and have fun with singlehood! And maybe, adopt a baby. NOLAR, i like kids, but to have one is painful and irritating.

Going back to sis, when she's back mummy become more happy, i get lamer and everyone gets happier. Maybe she have the fatty luck in her =) Whenever she's back, she reminds me of our childhood life and all the chaos we bring to the family. We always fight and yell and i'm always being so rebellious to the family. There is a lot of fights going on. And i always always fight with my mummy, but we never fight anymore. I never yell at her, or bang the door to show my anger. I just basically stop fighting with her. I might still not listen to her at times, but we never really fight anymore. Its peace and harmony at home unless that bitch aunt of mine decides to do some crappy shit to the house. I swear to god, i will kick her out of the house when she gets old. muahahahaa.

The truth is i'm suppose to study law and i'm actually halfway to it. I'm drinking tea and eating biscuits and i want to shit but too damn lazy as usual to go to the toilet. =p Back to my book then.

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